You are Unlove my ability

shame less
sleep less
point less
fame less

I walked in to the cafe, smoking a cigarrette

I walked in to the library, smoking a cigarrette

I walked in to my house, smoking a cigarrette

I walked in to my life, smoking a cigarrette

you told me it would help me die
…………………………….what a lie

the space widens with time

I sit here feeling like Hemmingway

wishing i was Henry David Thoreau,
Or maybe even Egar Alan Poe.

What would Whitman Say
……………down by the bay
making things out of…clay

maybe hey

That unloveability
is nothing more
than a neglect

a guarded neglect
maybe
a welcoming neglect
positively

I have never read Whitmam
I knew a girl way back
She loved the leaves of grass

She loved Dylan
the Lay, lay, lay

she loved to take her shoes off
cutting the collars on her t-shirts
no obstructions

she loved to look at the stars
she showed me the northern lights
who didnt long for space camp

She had several ponds
we went night swimming

she loved the smart invertabrate
she bought a stuffed one

she moved to a swamp
to admire the bugs

running down the hillside
off the dock, into the pond

into the water

how could i have been so intimidated
why did i know i would make it not work

why my greatest ability
has to be unloveablity
is a matter of chance

She told me one time that i had made her cry

could she have truly cared for me
it most likely, was the case

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